A guide for misinformed investors
🏆 The Absolute Winner: DOGE - From Joke to Global
- The Only True One: Dogecoin (DOGE) - created in 2013 as a parody, now has a $23B market cap and is accepted by Tesla.
- 'The Poor 'Heirs': BabyDoge, DogeFather, Shiba Inu - over 5000 clones priced from $0.00000001 to $0.01. Why do they exist? Because:
- 'If Doge made billionaires, maybe I can do that with my dog in a suit!'
- 95% are scams with liquidity locked by founders (you can buy, but you can't sell).
🐸 Pepe Mania: From Meme to Billions of Useless Tokens
- Pepe Coin (PEPE): The original, with a $5.5B market cap.
- Toxic Clones: Pepe 2.0, PepeCash, Based Pepe - 2000+ versions with the same logo but different contracts. The risk?
- Backdoor contracts: The founder can block sales when the price is high (see 'Sell Tax 100%').
- No utility: No dApp, just pure speculation.
🇺🇸 Trump Tokens: The Political War on Blockchain
- MAGA (TRUMP): Official, associated with his campaign.
- Fake Warriors: TrumpDoge, SuperTrump, TrumpCoin - 50+ impostors.
- 'How do you distinguish them?'
- Real TRUMP: Verified contract, doxxed team.
- Fake: Created by 'anon123' with a 30% sales tax.
☠️ Why DEXs Are Minefields (and CEXs Are Parks with Fences)
| Metric | DEX (Uniswap) | CEX (Binance) |
|---------|----------------|--------------|
|Security|0 protection| KYC + token verification|
|Fake Token | 70% new tokens | 0 . |
|Rug Pulls | 3-5 daily | Almost impossible |
|Liquidity | Often insufficient| Guaranteed |
Dark joke: 'Buying tokens on DEX is like taking candy from strangers: 99% are safe, but 1% turns you into a statistic.'
🔍 3 Golden Rules to Avoid the Scam
1. Check CONTACT ADDRESS on CoinMarketCap:
- If it’s not listed, it’s like a winning lottery ticket that’s been burned.
2. Search for 'Audit' on Certik or Hacken:
- No audit = founders have the keys to your bank.
3. Google + Twitter = Your Armor:
- If you find 'SCAM' in the first result, run faster than a bullet.
You can check on Scamarviser or Trustpilot - but don't believe there 100% either because many reviews are bought.
💣 Why Even the 'Official' Name is a Trap
- Bloody Example: 'Shiba Inu' (SHIB) vs. 'Shiba Inu 2.0' (no team) vs. 'Shiba Phantom' (rug pull in 2023).
- Scammers' Favorite Tactic: Copy the name + logo, change the contract to steal everything.
🤡 Conclusion: The Crypto Market is a Zoo - Some Animals Are Real, Others Are Plush
- Smart Investors: Buy DOGE, PEPE, TRUMP only on CEX or directly from the official source.
- Adrenaline Junkies: Take risks on DEX for a chance at 100x (but know that 90% of the portfolio can disappear).
- The Diamond Rule:
'If the token promises '1000x in 2 days' or has 'Doge' in the name, check it 10 times. If it still seems suspicious, put the money in slot machines - there the odds are better.'
P.S. The world has 10,000 tokens, but only 100 have real utility. The rest are social experiments... with your money.
#MemeCoinMadness #RugPullSurvival #CryptoRealityCheck
⚠️ Supreme Warning: Never let humor ease your vigilance. In crypto, jokes cost billions.
