$BTC

Late at night, amidst the roar of air conditioners in the Inner Mongolia mining site, Old Zhang stared at the BTC price crazily bouncing at $87,000, when suddenly he received a call from miner Xiao Wang: "Zhang Boss! Our mining rig's hash rate just broke 100EH/s, and the whole network's hash rate skyrocketed to 120EH/s—what is this, mining? It's being a human battery for Americans!"

Sister Li at the next workstation chimed in while chewing on spicy strips: "What do you know? The Americans just announced they are using AI mining rigs to mine Bitcoin, and our Ant S21 mining rig just performed a miraculous launch right on the spot!" Suddenly, trader Xiao Liu rushed in shouting: "Quick, look! The SEC said they are going to investigate the 'carbon emission hash rate' of Chinese mines!" The entire mining site collectively buzzed in protest—these days, even the hash rate has to wear an environmental hat?

At this moment, the LCD screen on the wall suddenly popped up a news alert: "Japanese pension funds announce they are buying BTC, and Chinese square dance aunties formed the 'Silver-haired Miners Alliance' overnight!" Old Zhang sprayed coffee onto his keyboard: "Good grief! Trump's tariff stick didn't take down China, but it turned the square dance team into miners?"

At this time, the contract zone suddenly erupted. A certain big shot roared in the group: "Americans raised tariffs? I’m going to short the Dow futures directly, using ETH as ammo!" Old Zhang silently adjusted the mining rig's power to 100%, thinking: what is this, a trade war? It's clearly a showdown of the entire network's hash rate!

The next day, Old Zhang discovered a new 'Crypto Retirement Home' opened next to the mining site, with the slogan: "Exchange Bitcoin for square dance speakers, carbon emissions? Not a thing!" This world is changing too fast; even miners have to learn international trade now...