📰 BREAKING NEWS:

"Friend Just Asked About Bitcoin... Now He Can't Leave 😳📉"

A local man innocently asked, “What is Bitcoin?” 🤔

5 hours later, he’s still stuck on a couch 🛋️ with charts 📊, whiteboards 🧠, and words like “blockchain,” “decentralized,” and “HODL” echoing in his ears. 😵‍💫

Witnesses say the speaker only paused once — to get his laser pointer 🔦.

"I just wanted to know if I should buy some..." the victim whispered, eyes hollow. 👀