Asif Ahmed1

#FOMCMeeting UPDATE The Fed just wrapped up their meeting, and let’s just say the only thing climbing faster than rates was Powell’s stress level when someone dared to say “soft landing.” Wall Street traders “They held rates—we’re going to the moon!” Powell, deadpan: “Did I mumble?” Every millennial homeowner:b“Sooo... refi time? The Fed “Hard pass, buddy. Market vibes right now Stocks: Feeling themselves Bonds:Having an identity crisis Crypto: Raging like it’s 2021 again Gold:Just chilling * Recession:Sitting in the waiting room reading 3-month-old magazines Powell’s press conference in a nutshell “We’re doing what needs to be done.” Translation “We're guessing with graphs.” Let’s be real—FOMC meetings are now a mix of market chaos, Fed-speak decoding, and Gen Z discovering what “hawkish” means. See you next time—bring snacks and a therapist with a finance degree. #Write2Earn