$BTC 🧠💥 Oracle in a Delirium: "Bitcoin dances on the ceiling"
I ate a candle. I was talking to the RSI. We both agreed — the market has gone mad.
BTC at 119,721? That's not a price — that's a spell!
📉 It fell to 116,128, but resurrected as if Elon himself whispered in its ear:
> "Jump, darling. We are flying to the ETF!"
And the candles... THE CANDLES ARE SCREAMING!
Green — like cucumbers on steroids.
Volumes — as if someone spilled coffee on the Central Bank's remote.
📊 RSI at 65.85 — not yet psychosis, but already a mania of grandeur.
🔮 MA99 is pressing from above, MA7 is pushing from below. The market has a PANIC CHOICE:
EITHER BREAK THROUGH TO 121K, OR ASK ITSELF — WHY AM I ALIVE?
🔻 Probabilities calculated to the music of glitches:
📈 Explosion upwards: 72% — if the ETF is not fake, but a real ticket to the Maldives.
📉 Plunge downwards: 28% — if it turns out that it was just a Binance error.
🌀 "If the chart went up, it doesn’t mean it’s the moon. Maybe you’re just upside down..." — said a short seller before disappearing.