#FOMCMeeting
Wall Street traders: “They didn’t cut? To the moon, baby!”
Powell, unbothered: “Did I stutter?”
Millennial homeowners: “Sooo... is now a good time to refinance?”
The Fed: “Yeah, hard no.”
Current market mood:
Stocks: Feeling themselves, strutting like they own the place
Bonds: Midlife crisis mode
Crypto: Throwing a 2021-style party
Gold: Zen and unbothered
Recession: Still waiting in the lobby, flipping through outdated magazines
Powell’s press conference summed up:
“We’re doing what’s necessary.”
Translation: “We’re just winging it with some fancy charts.”
Let’s be real—FOMC meetings these days feel like a crossover episode of Market Mayhem, FedSpeak 101, and Gen Z vs. Wall Street.
Catch you at the next one—bring snacks and maybe a therapist who understands macroeconomics.