Today 0 U, April 9, 2025

A classmate left a message in my diary asking, "Didn’t you say you were going to stop trading?" "Didn’t you say you wouldn’t write in your diary anymore?" I did say that, I spoke out of turn, and I’ve done it more than once or twice. Right now, I don’t even have food to eat, and I don’t know if I still have any bottom line. All I know is that even dogs have a much better life than I do. My diary has recorded my joys, sorrows, arrogance, pride, and heart-wrenching tears, but this is me. I also don’t know what will happen tomorrow? I can only document a fleshy and real me today. I wish I could ride on a rainbow and be a talented child of destiny, but in reality, I might be an ordinary person, someone with a wretched fate, with high aspirations but a fragile life.

I feel like I’m a gambler now. Perhaps none of the punctuation in my diary is trustworthy. My diary seems to have no value at all, maybe I was wrong from the start, I was terribly wrong.

But I long for change; I desperately want to change my fate. I want to have a bottom line, I want to have integrity. No one wants to commit crimes; no one is born to be a prostitute. But reality is so cruel. Many people in life become prisoners, and many sell their bodies to survive.

I just want to use my diary to honestly record my experiences in cryptocurrency trading, to vent emotions, to review, to celebrate successes, to mourn failures, to preserve memories.

Whether I succeed or fail in the future, I hope my diary can provide some inspiration to those in the crypto trading community. I am a living example. I want to share why I write a diary. In the past, I had seen the diary written by Brother 480,000. He ultimately failed, but I didn’t grasp the essence of his diary, and I regret that. At the time, I just regarded it as a pretty diary.

If there’s a cliff ahead of my choices, I hope there will be someone to pull me back. I hope the loan can be approved smoothly. Right now, I am working hard to pay off my debts. I repaid 300 yuan yesterday and still owe 18,000 yuan. Additionally, I am working on unfreezing a bank card; the other party is strong and professional, not charging a penny before the unfreezing. They also want to offer me a commission through a contract, which I rejected. What good is a contract? If it weren't for the contract, I would have been rich by now.