Biden administration is being whipped: Trump accuses of "stupid sell-off"
"Biden and his gang are simply selling national assets at a low price!" Trump went all out at the summit, criticizing the previous government for selling Bitcoin at a price "far below long-term value." He then threw out a trump card - a strategic reserve of 200,000 Bitcoins (partly from confiscated assets), threatening to learn from the Fort Knox vault and turn BTC into a "digital gold fortress." Coin friends shouted: "This is patriotism, the United States is a real HODLer!"
Regulatory shackles shattered! Chokepoint 2.0 is terminated
"Regulatory war? There is no such thing!" Trump announced the end of Operation Chokepoint 2.0 (Bank Chokepoint) in the Biden era. Previously, American crypto companies were forced to "wander overseas" because their accounts were blocked. Now they can finally go home to make money. What's more, he threatened that Congress would quickly pass the (GENIUS Act) - the legalization of stablecoins + the countdown to the tax-free carnival, which scared Wall Street shorts to change their reports overnight!
Zero tax rate carnival? The cryptocurrency circle may usher in the "tax-free era"
Although the speech was only 2 minutes, Trump buried a super Easter egg: Cryptocurrency capital gains tax will be zero! As soon as the news came out, the whole network went wild, and the leeks were ecstatic: "Finally, I don't have to work for the IRS!" If it comes true, the United States will become a "cryptocurrency paradise" in seconds, and institutional funds may pour in like mad dogs. An analyst joked: "This wave is Trump personally attracting new users to Binance and Coinbase!"
US Dollar Hegemony 2.0: Stablecoins Become a Secret Weapon
"Dollar hegemony? We want to use stablecoins to extend it for another 100 years!" Trump is pushing for stablecoins anchored to the dollar, and is clearly trying to turn USDT and USDC into "digital dollar colonies." The old friends in the cryptocurrency circle understood immediately: "Isn't this the Federal Reserve on the chain? From now on, cryptocurrency speculation = patriotism!" There are also reports that the United States is plotting to use stablecoins to harvest the global payment market, and Visa and SWIFT are already trembling.
Mysterious Easter Egg: The government is going to hoard 1 million BTC?
In addition to the 200,000 BTC in open reserve, Senator Loomis and others have proposed to stockpile 1 million BTC (currently worth about $700 billion) within five years. Netizens are wondering: "Do we have to vote with Bitcoin in the next election?" "Satoshi Nakamoto: I should have left a backdoor for the White House..." If this comes true, the US government will become the largest Bitcoin whale, and can even influence the market's ups and downs!
Warning! Trump's "sweet trap"
Despite all the good news, no one believes that this government will not cause trouble! The Ministry of Finance holds the power to sell and may dump stocks at any time to "cut leeks" [^Supplementary content]. The KOL in the cryptocurrency circle reminded: "Don't just look at the zero tax rate. When the reserves are sold, the waterfall will teach you a lesson in minutes!" Some conspiracy theorists even suspect: "Has the Trump family's wallet secretly increased its holdings?"
Cryptocurrency Spring Festival Gala Easter Egg: Saylor shouts “All in”
The summit was like the crypto Spring Festival Gala: MicroStrategy boss Saylor passionately called out "BTC = digital real estate", Ripple CEO secretly promoted CBDC, and even Nasdaq came to talk about ETFs. The most exciting thing was that Trump finally said: "The future of finance? We, the United States, have the final say!" - Coin friends collectively had an intracranial orgasm: "I understand, full warehouse! Full warehouse!"
Summary of the secret code to get rich quickly: Passage of zero tax rate bill → Institutional FOMO → Stablecoin legislation → US dollar hegemony continues → BTC reserve pull → Trump re-elected → Bull market! Never! Reverse! Adjustment!
(Risk warning: The above plot is purely a fantasy of the cryptocurrency circle. Please remember to pay homage to Satoshi Nakamoto before investing)
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