I began my trading journey with all the elegance of a drunken squirrel on a unicycle—betting on binary options like I was auditioning for a Netflix docuseries called How Not to Trade. Spoiler: I lost money. Then I remembered I had a Binance account I’d opened on a whim, logged in, and was immediately greeted with something that looked like the Matrix if Neo had zero clue what a candlestick was.
So naturally, I lost more money.
Crypto, as I understood it, was like stock—but for companies that don’t exist, run by code I couldn’t read, and powered by vibes. Then I found futures and leverage, which translated to “how to lose faster, but with style.”
Eventually, after staring at charts until my eyes crossed, things started to click. I discovered Simple Earn, Auto-Invest, and—crucially—that most dApps are scams in a trench coat. Rug pulls taught me to value my time as well as my coins.
Then came Binance Convert Limit. Glorious. Precise. I could finally feel like an actual trader with my measly cents.
Now I’m battling my real enemy: instant gratification. But hey—chart patterns are making sense, and this time? I might just not lose.
DYOR, you beautiful degenerates.