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🚨🚨 Michael Saylor Spotted Filling Olympic Swimming Pool With $BTC QR Codes*🚨🚨
1. I don't diversity; I laser-focus," says Saylor while wearing a cape made of cold wallets.
In a move that has stunned both Wall Street and the nearest crypto Twitter group chat, Michael Saylor — Bitcoin's unofficial hope priest — has announced that Strategy (formerly MicroStrategy, now apparently a personality cult with a stock ticker) plans to raise a jaw-dropping $84 billion to buy even more $BNB .
Yes, you read that right. While the rest of us debate whether to spend $350 on coffee or buy 0.000001 $BTC , Saylor is casually leveraging the GDP of Panama to scoop up more digital gold.
When asked if $84 billion might be a tad risky, Saylor replied, "Risky is trusting the fiat in your savings account. Risky is trusting the math... and me."
The Great BTC Hording Begins
Strategy now owns 553,555 BTC, which experts say is enough to buy every avocado toast in California for a year, or maybe just one studio apartment in San Francisco.
