$TRUMP My friend asked me if I could explain crypto. I said crypto is like a pet dragon that eats electricity, breathes decentralized fire, and sometimes goes on strike. You feed it your savings, it grows wings overnight, then flaps them wildly until it either soars to the moon or crash-lands in a dumpster fire. Meanwhile, you’re left clutching a keyboard, chanting “HODL,” hoping your dragon remembers it’s supposed to guard your treasure. Sometimes it burps NFT collectibles, other times it poops transaction fees. So welcome to crypto: the only hobby where your wealth doubles on Tuesdays and vanishes by Friday.