🎤 If Altcoins Were Rappers...

$BTC – Jay-Z

The OG. Doesn’t need to prove anything.

Old money. Big moves. Quiet flexes.

Still runs the game, even when it’s boring.

"I might not drop often, but when I do… the whole market moves."

$ETH – Kendrick Lamar

Intelligent. Complex. Tries to innovate a little too hard sometimes.

Everyone respects him, but half the crowd doesn’t understand what he’s doing.

"Here’s a smart contract about gas fees, generational trauma, and LSD staking."

$SOL – Travis Scott

Hyped. Flashy. High-speed energy.

Throws crazy parties, but sometimes the mic cuts out mid-show (network downtime).

"I drop hard, I crash harder, and I still trend on Twitter."

$ADA – J. Cole

Always “building,” but never dropping.

Deep lyrics, real potential… but fans are tired of waiting.

"The album’s coming. The update’s coming. The future is coming… eventually."

$XRP – Ja Rule

Used to run things. Got into legal beef.

Now mostly memes, nostalgia, and lawsuits.

"Don’t count me out yet! (SEC: Yes we will.)"

$DOGE – Lil B (The Based God)

Makes no sense. Still has a cult.

Posts memes, makes money, breaks every rule.

"Much wow. Many gains. No fundamentals."

$AVAX – Future

Ice cold, scalable, and toxic to ETH maxis.

Pumps hard. Dumps harder.

"I never loved them rollups anyway."

$PEPE – 6ix9ine

Loud, viral, zero credibility, zero chill.

Gains insane traction… then disappears.

"Buy me now, regret me later."

$MATIC – Logic

Started off respected. Tech-focused.

Now lowkey corny and everyone’s moving on.

"You ever heard a Layer 2 rap about TPS and gas rebates? No? Good."