While backpacking, I've shared rooms with many girls.
The first time I stayed at a youth hostel in Wuyi Mountain, I wanted a cheap bed space but was afraid to share with strangers. So I asked the owner if there were any empty beds available. Fortunately, there weren’t many people then, and there were vacant rooms. Looking back, it’s quite funny how naive I was at that time.
The first time I shared a room with the opposite sex was at the international youth hostel in Zhangjiajie, where two foreign women checked in at night. Later, I stayed in a mixed-gender dorm at a hostel on the mountain, but now people are not allowed to stay there, which is quite inconvenient.
Once, when I went to Lugu Lake, I injured my hamstring while hiking. There were no available spots in the male dormitory, and the upper bunk in that hostel had no ladder, so I had to climb up and down using my own ability. I couldn't manage to climb up due to my injury, so I discussed with a young man, and he let me stay in a female four-person room, where there was only one girl. We chatted for a long time, and I told her about my leg injury and that I felt embarrassed because I might snore. She said it was okay.
The first time I went to Tibet, I met four partners on the train, three men and one woman from three different places. On our way to the Everest Base Camp, we stayed at the Shigatse Hotel. One of the guys wanted to stay alone, while the other two guys were friends sharing a room. I looked at the girl, and she generously said it was fine. This was probably the first time I really shared a hotel room with a girl. In the morning, she quietly asked me what to do if she was constipated, and I said to drink more water. I didn’t mention eating more vegetables, as that would be a bit hard and costlier in Tibet.
The real long-term room-sharing with a girl was with an online friend. We had shared rooms in the Qinghai-Gansu loop before. This time in Yunnan, it was just the two of us at a hotel in Luoping. I was dizzy; the bathroom had frosted glass, and you could clearly see the human silhouette inside when the light was on. I felt quite awkward, so we went out together to buy a roll of sealing tape and taped the sheets to the glass. That roll of sealing tape is still in my toolbox. Later, we got used to it and didn’t hide anymore. Afterward, she had to go home to deal with some matters and invited another girl to accompany me. The three of us shared a room, and if there was a triple room, that was best; if not, we would sleep in a double room with the beds pushed together.
Later, one of the girls ran out of money and went home. I traveled with another girl along the Yunnan border, shopping for groceries and cooking together in Heshun, and watching clouds roll over the mountains by the Nu River. After leaving the Nu River, I rejoined an online friend and headed north on the Yunnan-Tibet route. Sigh, being too familiar isn't good; they always took my bed. I'm used to sleeping on my right side, and I don't want to face them all the time.
I have been to Xinjiang three times, all sharing rooms with girls. I enjoy sharing rooms with girls because they don’t snore, don’t smoke, and smell nice. I am somewhat older, and perhaps the girls feel I’m less than ideal! I do act a bit inappropriate, but it’s all in fun; I wouldn’t do anything else. We usually split expenses, and sometimes buy water or something. I wouldn’t nitpick with them. If a girl wants to travel with me, I always ask to share a room or meals, and if they agree, we go together. If they don’t want to, then that’s fine. I’m very clear that I do it to save costs; I’m not looking for anything from you, so don’t expect anything from me. I’m poor, but we can enjoy the most beautiful mountains and seas together, and I’ll take your pictures. If two people have to have separate rooms, I’m sorry, I can’t afford that; I’d rather stay in a youth hostel or a small inn by myself.
At first, washing small underwear might be awkward, but after doing it once, you get used to it, and it doesn't matter anymore. Girls usually wear long pants to sleep. They tend to have more belongings; once they enter the room, they start spreading out their things. As a man, I try to minimize my space. Many inns don't allow hanging clothes out, so we would pull a rope in the room to dry our clothes.
The only regret is that as I grow older, I tend to snore while sleeping, which makes me feel sorry for the girls. When I was younger, I didn’t snore, so I try to let the girls sleep first before I do. However, the girls say they tend to get up at night.
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Supplement on 2025/5/5
Of course, there are also failures.
That was in Guizhou. After getting off the train, I saw four men and one woman negotiating with a local driver to go to a certain Dong village, so I approached to listen. The driver was charging by the whole car. I proactively discussed with them, asking to join them to share the transportation cost. So we all went to the Dong village together, found a place to stay, paid, dropped off our luggage, and then went out to explore. I heard that the village had caught fire the previous year, and many houses were destroyed. Now, the newly built ones are all red brick and cement, looking very unattractive. We searched around and didn't find a place to eat. There was actually a small shop selling cold noodles, but nobody was in charge, and I could smell a sour smell from afar. We saw a family preparing for a wedding, so one of the partners suggested we contribute a bit and join the feast. Then something interesting happened. A local child came over, and an adult casually grabbed a few bloody pieces of raw pork for the child. As the child took it, one large piece fell near a pile of cow dung. The child picked it up and put it in their mouth without wiping it. We stared at the flies on the cow dung for a long time, and one partner said he wanted to go back and call the driver. So we all raised our hands in agreement, went back to check out and get our luggage. Everyone felt a bit embarrassed and compensated the old lady who was the landlord half of the money. We found a hotel in the county city, and the four men booked two standard rooms. I wanted to share a room with that girl, but she ignored me, and I had to spend over a hundred yuan on a luxury for myself. Later, I asked the four men, and they said they didn’t know that girl either; they were just sharing the ride. The next day, I moved to a youth hostel, where the eight-person room only had me as a guest, and I slept really well.
Also in the northeast. I had originally arranged to meet someone, a girl who had traveled with me before and we got along well. I met her at the bus station in Harbin, but unexpectedly, she brought along a companion, a short-haired slightly chubby woman from the same province. At first, it was fine; we stayed in hostels together, and when there were no hostels, we could manage with a triple room or one large and one small room. That girl knew I was trying to save money and would bargain with the owner. Then one day, I don't know why, that girl was in a bad mood and left us to wander alone. I asked the short-haired chubby girl what was wrong, and she also said she didn't know. I thought it might be due to her special period that occurs a few times a month, so I didn't pay much attention and continued to wander with the short-haired chubby girl. A few days later, by a cold, windy river, the girl might have had cold hands and shoved her hands into my pockets while we walked. After returning, I felt that the short-haired chubby girl started to be unfriendly towards me, and when I talked to her, she hardly responded. It became quite awkward. It felt like she was giving me the cold shoulder. For example, when we had a large and a small room, my small room didn’t have a bathroom, so I went to their large room to shower, and the girl came to my room to avoid it, while the chubby girl would just sit on the bed playing with her phone. When the girl called her, she wouldn’t move. So I felt uncomfortable and decided to separate from them midway.
In Burqin, I traveled to Kanas and teamed up with a few partners on the bus, one of whom was a girl who stayed at the same hostel as I did. We had seen each other but weren't familiar. However, I am a bit friendly and can strike up a conversation if I'm interested. We found a room with a 50 yuan bed in He Mu and stayed together. At that time, it was after the National Day, and many inn owners had retreated down the mountain, so accommodation prices dropped. Now it is probably hard to find this price. Returning to the original hostel in Burqin, there were hardly any people left, just a man and a woman. The owner said there was a room near the boiler, which was warm, so I didn't think much of it and shared a room with the girl. She didn't say much either because she had shared a room in He Mu before. However, she seemed to have something on her mind and wasn't in a good mood; perhaps she was out to relax. There are many such girls on the Sichuan-Tibet route.
When sharing a room with girls, hygiene must be taken seriously. I don't have athlete's foot, but I habitually carry an aromatherapy bag when I go out. There's a reason for this. Back when I was on a bus from Urumqi to Burqin, a woman sat next to me and drank a whole bucket of milk, then let out a very foul-smelling fart that nearly knocked me out. I didn't dare to cover my nose for fear of causing ethnic tension. Since then, I always bring an aromatherapy bag with me. Even in shabby little inns at bus stations, the scent can mask the strange smell of the room, making me feel a bit more comfortable.
When using the toilet with girls, it's best to use the squat style. I'm talking about boys peeing; even when standing, it's best to wipe afterward. I've noticed that girls like to put the toilet seat down after using it, so I've learned to do that too.
Some people ask where to find travel partners. In the past, there were many posts on forums and chat software for travel buddies, but the probability of actually going through with it online is low; it’s only after people truly set out that the success rate is higher. However, building long-term friendships online is more reliable. Several of my long-time friends are from the internet. The main thing is to team up in hostels. It’s usually hard to form teams in the mainland. If you are traveling the Sichuan-Tibet route, it’s easy to pick up or be picked up by people, which mainly depends on your personality and social skills. Also, everyone needs to get along, and if they’re reliable, they will introduce their friends to each other. While I’m out, I have friends asking me where I am and if any girls want to go somewhere, asking if I can take them along.
I'll stop here for now and write more if I think of anything later.
