Breaking News: Bitcoin Buys Human
In a shocking twist, Bitcoin has officially bought a human. Sources say the cryptocurrency got tired of being bought, sold, and blamed for people's bad decisions.
The human, now owned by 0.0003 BTC, is reportedly refreshing price charts every 3 seconds, whispering “please go up” like a prayer.
Bitcoin declined to comment, but did tweet: “Not financial advice. Just vibes.”
