🔥 "I Asked Trump About Bitcoin Over Dinner – His Reply Could Make You Rich"
🚨 Breaking the 4th Wall:
“They said I couldn’t get Trump to talk crypto. They were wrong.”
🍷 Scene-Setter (Fiction That Feels Real):
Mar-a-Lago, 9 PM. Trump sips Diet Coke, eyes a golden Bitcoin statue.
Me: “Mr. President, if you hate CBDCs, will you pardon Silk Road’s Bitcoin?”
Trump: “I love Bitcoin. The real enemy is China’s digital yuan. We’ll bury them with mining!”
(Imaginary steak sizzles as he drops a policy bombshell.)
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💥 3 SHOCKING THINGS TRUMP “SAID” (That Could CRASH or PUMP Your Portfolio):
1️⃣ “ETH is a Security? Ridiculous! We’re Deregulating EVERYTHING!”
(Why it matters: ETH to $10K if Trump backs an ETF.)*
2️⃣ “SBF? Total Loser. I’ll Lock Up Corrupt Crypto Crooks – BUT TAX-FREE GAINS FOR YOU!”
(Translation: Memecoin mania 2.0 incoming.)*
3️⃣ “I’m Buying MORE Trump NFTs – They’ll Be Worth $1M on Solana. BELIEVE ME!”
(Prediction: $TRUMP, $BODEN tokens will swing wildly. Play the election narrative.)
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📈 How to TRADE This NOW:
- Short CBDC-linked coins (Trump’s war on digital dollars = volatility).
- Buy U.S. mining stocks (Marathon Digital, Riot Platforms).
- HODL “Trump ETF” tokens – they’ll peak at July’s RNC Convention.
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🚨 WARNING: 90% satire, 10% REAL (Trump IS hosting crypto donors this month).
👇 YOUR MOVE:
Agree? Call me delusional? Comment below and I’ll DM you a FREE “Trump vs. Biden Crypto Portfolio” cheat sheet (24 hrs only!).
🔥 Follow for more “leaks” from my imaginary dinner…
