Lowkey tragic how accurate this is. The satire hurts because it’s real.

Performance Art is the New Utility.


Hello, degenerates and visionaries alike. I just have to take a moment to appreciate the stunning intellectual renaissance happening right here on Crypto Social Media. The innovation is truly breathtaking.
It’s beautiful how we’ve collectively evolved past boring old concepts like “building useful things” and moved into the golden age of Performance Art.
A Standing Ovation for Our Stars:
To the KOLs & Influencers: You’re not shills, you’re alchemists. You’ve mastered the art of turning your followers’ hopium into exit liquidity. The way you can say “This is not financial advice” right before giving the most financially desperate advice imaginable is pure poetry. You don't just chase bags; you are modern-day philosophers exploring the concept of "truth" as a relative, monetizable commodity.To the Builders (of Hype): Let's be real. Code is hard. Audits are expensive. But a slick website, a 10-page "litepaper" filled with words like "paradigm shift" and "Web3 infrastructure," and a paid tweet from a guy with a cartoon animal profile picture? That’s real utility. Who needs a working product when you can have a "vibrant community" on Telegram waiting to be rugged? You’re not scammers; you’re community organizers.To the Copy-Paste "Founders": Your ability to right-click, save-as, and change a color scheme is the kind of disruptive innovation that changes industries. You’re the post-modern artists of our time. The original project had a soul and a vision? Cute. You have a lower market cap and a louder marketing budget. You're proving that in crypto, authenticity is just an inefficient use of marketing resources.To the Centralized Decentralizers: A special shoutout to the giants who taught us that "decentralization" doesn't mean "no rulers," it just means "new rulers with cooler profile pictures." The way we escaped the tyranny of banks only to kneel before the almighty "CEX Listing" and "KOL Signal" is a plot twist worthy of Shakespeare. We fought the system, and then we became the system, but with more memes and less accountability. Bravo.
The New Crypto Playbook (It’s So Simple!):
Find a problem that doesn’t exist.Promise to solve it with a token.Get a KOL to call it "alpha."Watch the "community" FOMO in.Vanish.Re-emerge weeks later posting a thread about "the hard lessons I learned" and how you're now "building again." It’s the circle of life!
It’s genuinely inspiring. Why spend years building something of value when you can spend a weekend building a narrative of value? It’s faster, more profitable, and requires absolutely no pesky morals to get in the way.
So, to everyone in this magnificent circus: thank you. Thank you for making a mockery of every principle this space was founded on. Thank you for turning a potential financial revolution into a high-speed, unregulated parody of itself.
It’s a beautiful mess. And the best part? The show never has to end. There's a fresh batch of fools born every minute, and they’re all coming here, wallets open, ready for their lesson.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go back to the tedious work of actually building something. How quaint. #SatoshiNakamoto #Community #WAGMI #Crypto #Satoshi
$BTC