Sure! Here's a rephrased and compressed version of your humorous crypto post with a more thrilling and polished tone, tailored for crypto-savvy readers:

“Crypto made me a fortune!”

“Wow! What’s your fortune now?”

“Pre-heart attack.”

Let me know if you'd like a version with an image caption, tweet style, or meme format too!

#StrategyBTCPurchase #AltcoinSeasonLoading #BinanceHODLerERA #GENIUSAct