Yes, Bitcoin is digital money. Yes, it's volatile. And yes, someone once bought pizza with it. But dig a little deeper, and you’ll find stories so strange, they read like deleted scenes from a dystopian mockumentary.
Let’s start with Satoshi Nakamoto, the faceless ghost behind Bitcoin. Whoever they are, they mined over 1 million BTC—now worth tens of billions—and never touched a single coin. Imagine inventing the goose that lays golden eggs, and then just… walking away. That’s not genius. That’s supernatural restraint.
But the weirdness doesn’t stop there. In Kyoto, Japan, the centuries-old Kiyomizu-dera temple once accepted Bitcoin donations. Because nothing says sacred tradition like QR codes next to incense burners.
Meanwhile, North Korea has reportedly been mining and stealing Bitcoin, because apparently, launching missiles wasn't enough—they also wanted a stake in decentralised finance.
And then there’s the Great Bitcoin Civil War—a drama about block sizes so petty, it split Bitcoin in two. Thus was born Bitcoin Cash, proving that even in a trustless system, people still can't agree on anything.
So next time someone tells you Bitcoin is just digital gold, remind them: no gold has ever funded a dictatorship, split in half over a tech squabble, or paid tithes to a Buddhist temple.
