BREAKING: Govt announces #BitcoinReserveDeadline — all citizens must declare how many imaginary Bitcoins they brag about in group chats! Uncle Shafiq claims he “almost bought 2 BTC in 2012” and now owes emotional tax. Aunt Salma’s Candy Crush coins don’t count, sorry. Deadline: midnight tonight or the crypto police (aka your techie cousin) will audit your phone. Bonus: 5% discount on bragging rights if you used “HODL” unironically in 2017. Remember, if you’ve ever said “Blockchain will change everything” without knowing what a node is — this post is for you.
#CryptoComedy #DigitalDrama
