$BTC

Today, April 29, 2025, Bitcoin has been dancing like a caffeinated squirrel, hitting a high of $95,533 and a low of $93,580.

It opened at $95,048.91 this morning and is now trading at $94,953, up 0.18% since midnight.

Trading volumes spiked to 31.76 billion, enough to make even the most stoic hodlers break into a nervous sweat.

The market cap swelled to $1.867 trillion, which sounds like the GDP of a small country melting your brain.

Despite occasional dips, the long term narrative remains bullish, with whales snapping up coins in a show of on-chain strength.

My best educated guess? Expect more mini rollercoasters before Bitcoin pirouettes upward toward $96,000 by day’s end.

So strap in, dust off your top hat, and toast this carnival where else can your portfolio feel like a sitcom?

And if it plunges, you can always blame it on Elon Musk’s tweet or a squirrel infestation in mining rigs.