Trump’s Crypto Circus: Welcome to the First-Ever White House Crypto Summit ⚡️

Mark your calendars, degens — March 7, 2025, the White House goes full crypto-bro mode ⛓️. Donald Trump is hosting the first-ever Crypto Summit, bringing together Bitcoin maxis, blockchain nerds, and federal suits ⚖️ to figure out how much freedom is too much freedom when it comes to digital money.

Running the show: David Sacks — the White House’s official AI & Crypto Czar (yes, that’s his actual job title) — and Bo Hines, the man in charge of the Presidential Task Force on Digital Assets 💼. Their glorious mission? Write rules that don’t kill innovation, but still keep Uncle Sam happy. Best of luck, boys.

And because it’s 2025, they’re also talking about a national crypto wallet — because why let Coinbase have all the fun? 💣 Of course, Trump will bless us with a speech — expect something between “Crypto is yuuuge” and “Only I can fix blockchain.” 🦅

This isn’t just a summit — it’s a power move. The US isn’t here to adapt, they’re here to take the whole table. Regulation isn’t coming — it’s already here.