#TrumpBitcoinEmpire BREAKING: A new era in emotional medicine.

🇺🇸 In the glorious rise of the #TrumpBitcoinEmpire, scientists have unveiled a revolutionary treatment:

💊 GASIN GULAT – the world’s first pill that deactivates jealousy hormones.

One dose, and you’ll stop side-eyeing your neighbor’s Lambo.

No more rage when your ex flips JPEGs into millions.

No more tears when Chad makes 100x from memecoins.

Side effects may include:

Smiling at others’ success

Posting “gm” unironically

Becoming emotionally stable in bull and bear markets alike

Trump reportedly calls it:

“The best pill. The strongest. Everyone says so.”

Welcome to the new gold standard of mental clarity.

Welcome to the Trump Bitcoin Empire.

#MakeCryptoGreatAgain