Crypto Jokes · 2025 Latest Version:

Wife: Honey, I heard you recently made a fortune in crypto? Take me to Paris to shop at Dior!

Me: Honey, it’s not “Dior”, it’s DYOR!

Wife: What does that mean?

Me: Do Your Own Research!

Wife: …So have you researched?

Me: I have, I found out that now we even have to research whether “Uniqlo” is on sale or not…

Wife: (cold laugh) So what coins do you have left in your wallet?

Me: I have a shitcoin called “HOPE”, it just went to zero yesterday, now it’s renamed “NOPE”.

Wife silently takes out a kitchen knife: Come on, let’s research how to pay “minting tax” most cost-effectively today…

Crypto Quotes Update:

Previously it was “All in or nothing”

Now it’s “All in then nothing”